I'm up early to travel back east and posting this photo is making me so happy because yes I learned so much, yes, I have new skills, yes my whole interior got rocked (sometimes way more than I wanted), yes it feels good to be doing something so dynamic, but mostly it was the people. For better or for worse, I am always showing up to see who I can meet. I believe this next stage of human development has to happen in community. I learn most through conversation, especially when I am surrounded by people who are committed to their growth. This is why I almost only coach people in groups--it way easier and way more fun to wake up together. I woke up to a lot this week.
I had to sit with my own need for approval, my own fear of exclusion, my at-times startling performance anxiety. It's stuff that I thought I had already worked through but now I understand even more that we never finish with this issues. My wounds are the most alive places. My work is to integrate them, care for them, maybe even fall in love with those bits that soften me up so deeply to the bigness of life and the connection to others.
The community helps so much. It's not an easy path to be in such conscious relationship but I'm so often flooded by beauty that I'll take it and actually can't wait to do it again (our next session is in February). In the meantime, I'll be putting it all into practice.