Kitchen Disasters, Hate Crimes and Halloween Frogs (Self-Care to Hold it All Together Right Now)

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Hello Dearhearts,

How are you doing? This past week has been a lot and I hope you’re taking extra good care of yourself. Personally, I’m putting one foot in front of the other when it comes to self-care and find this technique is pretty much working. 

I shared a bit of that process on social media today.  
In case you missed it…

There’s been such sweetness and such sadness over these last days.I’ve been holding space for Micah who is from Squirrel Hill and doing the ridiculously healthy act of allowing himself his feelings and really grieving this immense loss. I’m also holding space for this sweetheart of a Halloween frog and all the joy he brings (can you tell he loves his costume?).

Further, I’ve been writing letters with Vote Forward and about to start text banking for Amendment 4 in Florida (which would overturn a horribly racist and classist violation of voter rights), hoping these small acts might help turn the tide.

Within all of this, I’ve been feeling pretty efficient, present, functional. Then on Monday, while I was rushing around to get ready for a workshop, I made a mistake while cooking (I won’t go into too much detail, but just make sure the cooking bowl is actually in your instant pot before you pour a blender full of mac ‘n cheese sauce in there *face palm*).

Suddenly, I went from super functional to a hot mess of emotions. The world felt like it was going to fall apart at any moment and I wanted to park myself on the couch and escape. It took lots of deep breaths and a therapy session before I could see this mishap as a powerful lesson.

With perspective, I could see that both things are true: I’m thriving and I’m struggling. I can use self-care to be ok and use self-care to not be ok. Embracing both gives me a much deeper sense of security than working overtime to get everything right (and losing it when I inevitably can’t).

So, during these tender times can we help each other with that? Can we see thriving and falling apart as immense acts of strength? Can we embrace the Halloween frogs while crying for those who have been killed? Can we expand our vision of life to accept the present while working like hell to make positive change in our future? I think we can. I hope we can.


How are you holding it together right now? Are you giving yourself space to both thrive and struggle? What keeps you buoyant and supported? (Hint, do more of those things!).

Keep sleeping, keep eating meals, keep allowing your emotions. As you have time and energy, keep finding waysto support this last big push for the midterm elections in the United States. Keep believing that change is possible (because it is!)

Wishing you extra resiliency in the coming days.

With care,