Wednesday Missive: Self-Care and Feeling Stuck (and how I got inspired again)

Hi Dearests,

Last week, I shared that I am hosting a FREEEEE webinar on March 24th (from 3 to 4pm EST, sign up here!).  It’s called Self Care 2.0, and I plan to  share the self-care that will help you to unstick your life and move forward.

(I taught Self Care 2.0 as an in-person workshop twice this weekend, and I received so much good feedback about the unsticking capacity of this self-care knowledge.  I can’t wait to share it with you!)

However, this week, as I sat down to write this newsletter, I realized that I was exactly that: stuck.  I had no idea what to write about, nor much energy to figure it out. After a few back-to-back lousy nights of sleep getting up with Jonah and a what felt like 100 other tasks that wanted my attention, I spent what little free time I had yesterday staring at a blank Google doc.

No inspiration, no clarity, no nothing.  I was stuck. Ugh.

Skipping my newsletter this week was an option, but I didn’t want to do that.  As I prepare for the spring round of Self Care 101 (My women’s self-care coaching circle, which is designed to unstick your life in the most marvelous ways—could that be you?  Apply here to find out.), I made a commitment to share my real life self-care struggles.  I wanted to uphold that commitment and not give into the stuckness, at least not that easily.

Normally, knowing what to write about is pretty easy for me.  Just like you, I go through my fair share of self-care struggles each week.  I do too much of some things and not enough of others. I worry that I’m on a wrong track that is leading to an epic failure of a dead end.

In these moments, I practice exactly the same self-care as I teach my clients.  I practice, because as my experience and my clients’ experiences have shown me - it works.  Sharing it with you all helps me to keep up my resolve for living a life of self-care - a messy, full and beautiful life.

But that day, there was nothing except empty space, a judgmental voice in my head, and an aching desire to go lay down.

So, as I stared at the blank screen, I thought of what I would tell a client.   Would I tell her to sit around and stew in her own stuckness? Would I tell her to force words onto the page?  Absolutely not.

I would tell her to go lay down.  I would tell her that inspiration would strike when it was good and ready to strike, as long as she was taking care of herself.

I took that advice.  I spent the rest of the afternoon resting, meal planning and chatting with a few wise friends.  I picked up Jonah, met Micah to go grocery shopping, and when we got home, I made us a ridiculously time-consuming vegetarian meal (see my Self-Care Inspiration below for the recipe).

Then, yesterday morning, I was reading Jonah a few books before his nap.  I picked up one I hadn’t opened before, “I Knew You Could.” It had a picture of a train on the front.  I started reading it to him and within a few pages, I was crying.

I know that my self-care action for the week - what would get me unstuck - was sharing this book with you all.  Jonah agreed to co-star.  After we finished the book, I put him down for his nap, and as I ate my lunch, I realized I felt ingloriously unstuck

This self-care - which is truly simple enough for a child to understand - really, really works. Listen to us reading the book to see what I mean.

Warning:  This video displays me as a real-life mom with messy hair, a squirmy baby and a few moments where I flub the lines.  I still think it’s worth watching.

After you’re done, make sure to sign-up for the Self Care 2.0 call!  In it, I’ll share the biggest way we get stuck, three simple self-care acts to unstick our lives and the very important way we can  see if we are keeping up momentum. (Did I mention it was free and could potentially change you how practice self-care forever? Go for it!)

That’s all for now!  I’ll be back next week with more real-life self-care.  In the meantime, try it for yourself. Notice when you’re stuck.  Then, instead of spinning your wheels in the mud, try a little conscious self-care.  The results might not be immediate, but I bet some helpful inspiration will start coming through.

We just have to give our lives space to work themselves out.  It’s scary, but it’s worthwhile. And you’re not alone as you do it.  We are all figuring it out together, little self-care action by little self-care action

With care,




Self Care Inspiration

Do you know how people are always saying you have to “feel your feelings?”  Well, how do you do that exactly? I signed up for TIMBO, a seven-week in-person meet-up group that teaches you how to process trauma and give space to your feelings.  I just finished the course and whole-heartedly recommend taking the time to learn these simple, yet not-always-easy skills.

Two bits of inspiration from the lovely Ann Friedman:

  1. Per her suggestion, I made Micah and I a “cromlet” (hybrid crepe and omelet) on Monday night.  This Asian-inspired, gluten-free vegetarian meal takes a little more kitchen work than I normally prefer for a two-serving dinner, but it’s very yummy and worth a try.

  2. To support her amazing friend Amina, who is living with a cancer diagnosis, Ann is organizing blood drives in the Twin Cities, LA, Chicago, NYC, DC, Austin and the Bay Area.  Sign up here, give blood, celebrate life.

I’ve been reading my weekly Free Will horoscope from Rob Brezsny for years now.  He has just the right balance of crazy and wisdom to provide a real gem that helps me understand the deeper journey of my weeks.